It has been an excellent day due to the numerous positive experiences, really exciting moments and great surprises! We all have been listening to great speakers all day, so let us give them some applause. And I am the last speaker to take the stage before we get a chance to see the amazing ballet added for our entertainment. I have had such an amazing experience learning from this extraordinary group of people - their knowledge has been invaluable! A few weeks ago I did something that I feel was a huge mistake, which is not unexpected for me unfortunately. In hindsight, I now realize it was a mistake but at the time I had no idea it would outcome like this. Fatherhood has its pitfalls, such as when my affectionate twelve-year-old daughter, a quick reader, read a book I wrote and declared she "hated it". When I asked why she responded that to her it was my most favorite piece of writing. She mentioned that throughout the book, it seemed like I was always crying, talking about killing myself, and even lying on the floor in tears. She asked simply if something was wrong with me. My daughter said, "Daddy that is really mean!" after I told her why I always strive for honesty. Even though I was feeling down, I wanted to be a good example for my children. So I responded by saying that it was essential for me to tell the truth. At the time, it was difficult for me; however, I am glad my daughter made that particular comment. Her words offered comfort and a rather beneficial perspective to me.
Having achieved great success with the business I had created and sold, within a short summertime period I went from fifteen million dollars to only forty-six dollars in my ATM machine; it was like going from "drunken rock star on steroids" status to destitution in no time. I was losing many important things in my life: my house, my marriage, and even my family. I felt so ashamed of myself. I was feeling so alone because I could not figure out how to talk to any of my friends. The pain got even worse as the situation led to losing all of my friends and it strained even my relationships with my parents. My two little girls meant the world to me, so despite feeling depressed and unable to cope, I took time just to consider the hard step of getting life insurance worth four million dollars for them. This would give both of them a secure financial future even if something happened to me. I could feel a wave of depression come over me while I had initially begun with excitement and a collage of different perspectives and ideas. Gradually, I was left with this overwhelming sense that there was just one solitary route to resolve all of my problems. I wanted more options, as I had two kids. Unfortunately my options were limited and that is why really needed to explore different choices.
The only thing that would make me feel better I thought was for the therapist to give me a check for a million dollars, but he said it would not work anyway. I trusted his opinion and realized that more often than not in life there are many options available from which we can choose our destiny. If you do not take charge of your own life, someone else is going to take control and the outcomes might not be ideal. This could be your parents, a professor, your boss, colleagues or even a company. As great and wise as I am being humble here, I can say that all decisions in life should be yours to make. I had failed and succeeded in business before, however lately there seems to be a culture of failure glamorization, which I am apparently a member of. In my case, I started 20 businesses with 17 resulting in failure. They say the phrase "Fail fast, fail often." turned into a kind of reverence for the unsuccessful, almost turning it into "failure pornography". Failure is certainly unpleasant, but instead of viewing it as such - Thomas Edison who went through over 10,000 attempts at his project of making an electric light bulb - suggests that we treat it simply as an experiment. He is proof that given enough commitment and effort even a seemingly unsuccessful endeavor can end in success. Every time I experienced success, there were four distinct aspects that were working for me and every time I failed, there were also four aspects that contributed to my failure so as an experiment, I looked back to analyze. Additionally, after this talk I will have added a fifth point.
I had made very unhealthy lifestyle choices: I was overweight, drinking heavily and consistently getting sick. On the floor feeling at my worst- I knew if I stayed like this, with constant sickly pneumonia or bedrest- saving the world would become only an impossible dream. To stay healthy and successful, it is essential to sleep well (8.6 hours a day for professional violinists), eat appropriately, and exercise regularly. Driving to and from the gym every day is not at all required; but finding opportunities every day to get some exercise from home or at work will help maintain positive results. Every day, I was aiming to better myself by walking more, eating healthier, sleeping longer, and limiting my time on my phone and my computer. Basically, I wanted to incrementally improve my behavior even if it was just by one percent. The average kid laughs three hundred times a day and I was going to start doing the same. Even when it comes to some performances by my kids, who are 13-year old teenagers by now, the adults stand around like it is an intermission because no one wants to go through with such boring experiences. The adults, all standing outside intermission, seem as overwhelmed by the kids' joy and excitement, who are chasing and laughing. The average adult laughs an approximate five times a day, whereas the average kid does so approximately 300 times a day. Keeping physically healthy is the first priority we need to focus on in order to address all the responsibilities and choices other people have made for us - and try to understand why this problem has come about.
The second essential part of my mental well-being was taking care of my emotional health. This involved feeling secure both in business and amongst the people I interacted with on a daily basis - assuring those around me were people I not only liked, but could genuinely trust. Every day, I made a commitment to 1% improve my relationships and sense of community with people I loved and trusted, as well as those who in turn loved and trusted me. Initially, this was extremely challenging for me to do, but eventually it became easier in the long run. When you are on the ground, life may seem difficult, but there are always things to be thankful for. Keep your head up and remind yourself that no matter what, life is still great! I wanted to experiment with my first experience of being loved by those around me, so I started with the lifestyle on the ground. After reportedly suffering from a head injury, I discovered that I had psychic powers and posted an ad on Craigslist stating so. In the ad, I encouraged people to reach out to me with any question they would like and promised to provide them with accurate answers. I received hundreds of emails that day, so I promptly discarded all messages from men and gave attention only to the ones sent by women. No, I did not go out with any of the women. Even though a lot of people asked me when they heard my story. The important thing is that I did become friends with some of them eventually. The presence of loved ones and those I trust has changed my life significantly. Having them close is now hugely important to me – the impact of them being in close proximity has been tremendous! Waking up with a feeling of being surrounded by people I love and who in turn, love me, has been an incredible blessing. It may sound easy, but it is not always so. The challenge lies in the fact that it is not always simple. One man who responded to my ad truly enjoyed all the ideas I was coming up with for business. It was helping him come up with new concepts left and right. He even told me, "Thank you!" But every Friday night he would go out drinking with his friends, and this was giving him an issue as they were trashing all of his ideas. What should have been done in this situation? Staying home on Friday night was the simple solution to a problem I mentioned to him; of course, I never heard back from him. Evidently even the most basic of instructional ideas can be difficult to carry out.
Creative gratitude can be seen as a form of spiritual practices, even though the word "spiritual" is one that I do not particularly like. I am always incredibly thankful for my family - my wife and children - but that feeling never fails to be bittersweet. I have an appreciation for everything, but it still feels like such a shallow type of acknowledgment at times. Raise your hand if you have complained at least once today - because I know I certainly have! Complaining can be draining, so how many people have experienced this already? I really can not make out if there is anyone in the audience that has made any complaints, as nobody here is raising their hands. On the way here, in traffic, someone in this audience might have been dreading, missing James Altucher's talk due to having passed up a ramp. It felt like it would be disastrous; much like getting sucked into a tractor beam bound for Tijuana - really not great news! However, you can still choose to be thankful for the fact that we live in an amazing and innovative city which is popular enough that the traffic can get overwhelming at times. Despite this, it is a reminder of how fortunate we are to be living here. Any time you find yourself thinking about a problem and complaints start to surface, keep in mind that focusing on gratitude allows for you to remain positive. Do not over pressure yourself by trying to drastically improve overnight; instead work toward getting 1% better each day.
Every day I write down ten ideas to help me be continually creative. To solidify this, I bring one thing with me to the event – a waiter's pad. This is to take down your orders later and helps inspire new possibilities and thoughts! If you suffered from a bike accident resulting in two weeks of being laid up in a hospital bed, your leg muscles would be severely weakened to the point that you would require physical therapy sessions just to ensure you can walk again. Within six months of writing down 10 ideas each day, you will become an idea machine - this is the power of the idea muscle. Increase this duration to a year and you will have generated a whopping 3,650 great ideas! Giving yourself permission to have a lot of bad ideas is key when becoming an “idea machine”: you will inevitably have plenty of them, but they can still be valuable. My own life has been greatly changed by adopting this mindset! Every six months, I undertake steps which have completely changed my life for the better - almost a 100% difference each time. This is the advice I would like to share: Take action today and believe in your intelligence, talent and capabilities. Give ideas - no expectation. That is the most important thing! Give ideas to others - come up with ten for different companies or people and share them with no expectations for a response. You would be surprised how often you can exceed those expectations when you do not expect anything in return. Out of every 50 or 100 people that you reach out to, approximately one or two are likely to respond back to you. Spreading ideas as a form of currency has been transforming my financial, personal and professional lives significantly. By initiating a chain reaction of passing on concepts and knowledge, I have created endless chances for myself in terms of raising my standards from the past. It has been an exciting journey to discover such beneficial alterations!
I am grateful to have this one moment to share together, because it is the only gift ultimately given to us by the universe. It is amazing that I have not even wet my pants while we have been here, as a sign of how enchanting- and treasured - this moment is! I am incredibly grateful that we have been able to all enjoy this special moment together, and to me this special experience is an opportunity to capture a snapshot of time through art. By creating and then displaying our artwork we can share this valuable experience with those around us. Thank you for allowing me the chance to speak and share my ideas with you.
See also: https://mygodsentangels.com/