The thoughts I think, the words I use, the emotions I experience, and the values and convictions which form my character; all of these inspire me. How optimistic and strengthened am I by them is something only I can truly understand. It's not a straightforward situation with many "grey areas": several components of the puzzle are still missing. The rates of both body dissatisfaction and life dissatisfaction have markedly increased as we have gained more knowledge concerning diet, exercise and weight loss - higher than ever previously recorded in history. I'd like to begin this talk by highlighting two ways: first, how self-love can positively inspire one's life; and second, offering techniques on how individuals can cultivate more self-love.
Forming and sustaining meaningful connections formed through love is one of the corner stones of being human. Bonding with others is a key fundamental need that all humans must embrace. I will never forget how much I loved and adored my mom; in my eyes, she was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Even today, recollecting those cherished moments feels like just yesterday. She was everything we had ever wanted in a superhero, combining Superwoman and a supermodel. Watching her get glammed-up for the night made eyes wonders these days; beautiful garments adorning her whenever she'd step outside. All was right in the world with her by our side. I would tell her, "Mom, you sure look stunning in that dress! Where are you headed? It would be great if we could capture this moment with a photo, don't you think?" I thought I would receive something nice in return, but it felt like a slap in the face when instead I heard the response: "Oh God no. I look so fat today. No pictures. Oh God no." I had feelings that just weren't appropriate in the situation; I was extending my affection when she wasn't capable of receiving it due to something blocking her.
When will it be that we stop looking outside ourselves for validation about our worth and instead validate our own worth without justification or people pleasing? If we learnt to truly appreciate our own worth and love ourselves, there would be no need for comparison with others. Through this competitive nature that drives us to enter competitions between others, we forget about the abundance in ourselves. How can we even hope to see an end to competing with those around us and recognize the invaluable power within? Love is true beauty that can be observed in our reflection: a magnanimous love steeped in kindness, compassion and empathy. Diets may have their place in our health but it's love that is the real power, the one thing that will transform us. Negative emotions cause the nervous system to be a chaotic state, whereas positive emotions help create alignment within it. We can make considerably better decisions for our lives, health and well-being when we come from an intentionally positive emotional mindset. This will positively reverberate in us – we can feel it! On average, we have about 70,000 thoughts in a day, with a whopping 98% of them repeating from the previous day. Unfortunately, 80% of those thoughts tend to be negative and target either ourselves or other people. I want to get closer to you, in fact I am in awe of you, so I compliment you. But all that adversity we are facing together can be daunting and can shut us down. Love is one of the first emotions we experience yet little by little it can go away if not nurtured.
I'm incredibly grateful for what I have been able to experience. This opportunity has been a real blessing to me. Within hours of my birth, I unfortunately had to be hospitalized due to a heart defect. Thus, sadly, my parents were instantly separated from me. Fear engulfed my parents when I had to be taken away to an incubator for medical necessities. I was not alright and this felt like the harshest reality of all. Growing up, I was surrounded by care and attention, which I never truly appreciated. All the love and healing efforts, together with the constant worrying and encouragement offered to me during my countless visits to the hospital ended up giving my heart incredible strength, although this only became apparent in retrospect. Did you know that negative emotion can actually weaken the integrity of our heart and arteries, while positive emotion strengthens them? It's quite fascinating that we have the power to harden our own arteries with our emotions. We are aware that gratitude is the special component today, and we understand the importance of expressing it. Gratitude is an important part today - and it can be seen in how we show appreciation even for the little things. From a very young age, my mortality has been quite evident; thus I felt privileged to have been made aware of the uncertainty of the future. Subsequently, I tried to live each day with elevated appreciation in order to always ensure that there will be a next day. I remember feeling upset when my mom did not respond to my compliments, so I made it a point not to make the same mistake with others. This has been a key learning for me over the years.
But the biggest and most important life lesson I had to learn was that the true depth of self-love can only be fully understood when one experiences pregnancy and postpartum. Surprisingly, this was something I had not realized prior to it happening within my own life. Moms are put under immense pressure every day to look, act and conform to certain standards by the surrounding society. This, however, becomes even more overwhelming when they become mothers as they feel an extra responsibility of needing to lose all the pregnancy weight gained and exhibit certain behavioral traits so that they are able to measure up and really care for their new babies and children. Though, we don't want to worry about our weight when welcoming a new baby and instead focus more on love, connection and bonding. Rather than obsessing over superficial matters, we should direct our energy towards creating a strong bond with the little one. I had succumbed to our culture's emphasis on thinness, and was worried that gaining at least 50 pounds during my pregnancy would tarnish my reputation as a trainer. I felt pressure to keep up with social standards, while offering advice that created this mental tension. I, unfortunately, gave myself a really horrible injury - resulting in two trips to the hospital in a single week. I had two babies at the time and being unable to lift them, bathe them or care for them as I desired was heartbreaking.
This brought more to light than expected - something I had grown so used to doing. Eating certain foods, purpose meant for it being to cancel out with a good workout later seemed like the norm for me, rather than acknowledging how wrong that notion actually is. I had never realized the strange tales and whispers that were occurring inside my head; not until now anyway. The impediments that hindered physical exercise encouraged me to glean a deeper understanding: soul-searching - exploring the interior aspects – was essential to promote my recovery process post child bearing. Despite the restrictions such as inability to perspire or feel pain while breathing, achieving true wellness requires more than just regular sweat exercises. Learning about the core became very important to me after I injured myself. Understanding how I could rehab my back led me to become much more knowledgeable about pelvic care and being able to distinguish between the deep core and superficial one. Additionally, breathing correctly, while important always, was now a newfound necessity in order to regain optimal health. If I had known then what I now know, teaching mom-and-baby boot camp would have been the wrong thing to do. After years of experience, I understand that exposing these new moms and myself to potentially dangerous scenarios was a serious error in judgement. This is the lesson learnt from my mistake.
"The Love FitMama Way" is the book I wrote to show that loving oneself, instead of expecting perfection and requiring constant effort, is the true path to being a fit mama. It's all about taking time off, listening to your internal compass and feeling confident in yourself. So many moms go through trauma and struggle to cope, which can lead them to shut down mentally. Our second brain, also known as our gut feelings, enables them to gain the resilience needed for this difficult situation. Instead of feeling love in our heart space, we get stuck in our heads where shame, regret and recriminations reign - thought such as "I shouldn't have done that!", "I didn't go to the gym" and "I'm so awful". There never seems to be an end. And yet, we still have the potential to revolutionize the experience of being a mother through education, empowerment and exposure. We don't have to stay in this state forever! This can be changed if we come together with one unified goal so they can learn more, be inspired and be aware of more possibilities.
In this culture that is overly-infatuated with weight, the goal of shedding excess pounds is everywhere. Constant bombardment of advocates, referencing and a near obsession with attempting to do the same alienates and places undesirable psychological pressures on a large segment of the population. Instead of judging people more than necessary, why not let go of these scarcity feelings? It's important that we engage in a journey of "judgement loss" by setting aside our feelings of unworthiness, which should always be open for questioning in and of themselves. You are valuable and were born worthy. This never needs to be altered, so keep that trust in what this means. That knowledge is there for the rest of your life and the accompanying belief in yourself. We have been in the mental habit of letting our experiences shape negative narratives about ourselves; this really provides no positive advantage. But, we don’t have to keep going like this despite its discomfort! We can create new pathways and rewrite stories full of self Love; it will be worth the effort.
Chocolate cake was once a proud representation of joyful celebration, but now these days it evokes words like guilt, shame, and regret; associated with moments of cheating and dastardly deeds. Participants in a recent study were split into two groups and each asked to evaluate their opinion on eating chocolate cake. In the first group, those who ate it felt guilty and bad. The second group that consumed the same dessert celebrated with joy; this being their natural mindset about the activity. The findings from the evaluation were that individuals within the guilt-ridden group displayed much higher cortisol levels. As is widely known, cortisol is indicative of a person's amounts of distress, so these levels obviously pointed out a considerable amount of anxiety in them. The guilty group experienced some more negative repercussions from their guilt: not only did they feel emotionally strained, but studies have shown that in the long term, these individuals were much more likely to remain overweight than others. In effect, their guilt created a high-stress atmosphere which proved difficult for them to lose weight over time. Choose the foods you eat consciously, without thoughts of cheating and other doubts creeping into your head like "Is this part of my diet?" or "That person said that's bad". Don't let guilt drive what you choose to consume – there is no right or wrong decision beyond being mindful of your own choices. Bring out the emotion from deep within your heart, allowing yourself to remember a moment of profound love. Connect with this feeling deeply and let the positivity radiate throughout.
The magic starts from the heart, believing and trusting that the values and beliefs one lives by are worthwhile. It flows into the core, where you can be sure that these principles deserve your faith. We yearn for a connection; an emotion filled with so much love that it transcends outward appearances. Our wish is to be welcomed, embraced and loved not just on the outside but equally held in light internally too. It is this feeling of connectedness which brings us joy and meaning from those around us. We want to connect with amazing, high-vibe people living life to the fullest. However, rather than allowing this connection we may often be consumed with feelings of unworthiness, shame and regret that create a low vibration. This prevents us from contacting and connecting with those individuals. I practice what I preach, thus I want to leave you with three things that I always do myself. Under no conditions allow negative comments to be said to you, especially from your own mouth, over every bit of progress you may have experienced - whether it was running that extra mile you hadn't before or eating something considered as "unhealthy". Promise yourself one thing: promote your image with positivity only. Let's replace those same 98% of thoughts from yesterday with something new: over 68,000 thanks to yourself! So here's to thanking the day, friends and life itself; in expression of appreciation for what we have. Thank you, thank you, thank you! In a single day, you could find 68,000 items that would undoubtedly produce plenty of inspiration and bring about improvements in your life; much more so than any pessimistic contemplation. Take some time every day to feel the love. Focus your attention on your heart, letting yourself tap into positive emotions which will give it strength. Go beyond the surface, breathe deeply and explore how things really work. Remember that we still can't judge any and all books by their covers. If you can appreciate and cherish the body and life that you possess, eventually it will come back to you in the form of having a life and figure that you love. Thank you for cherishing self-esteem.
See also: https://mygodsentangels.com/