On Healthy Relationships 128

On Healthy Relationships 128

Chi Nguyen ·

To what extent did the cogitations you entertained today contribute to the advancement of your life objectives, and to what degree did they impede your progress? Furthermore, do you possess mastery over the contents of your own mental deliberations? Upon acquiring the initial knowledge of the aforementioned inquiries, I was profoundly astounded. At that time, I found myself lodged within the serene confines of Suan Mokkh, a Buddhist monastery nestled amidst the verdant woodlands of southern Thailand, approximately four years ago. As one can surmise, existence within the confines of the monastery embodies a notably austere lifestyle. Rest is attained upon a wooden pillow, while a straw mat serves as the sleeping surface. Commencing the day at 4:30, a rigorous ten-hour meditation routine is undertaken daily. Sustenance solely consists of rice and vegetables, omitting any other dietary provisions. Hygiene practices are limited to showering with the aid of a bucket. During a particular morning meditation session, I experienced a profound revelation. It abruptly dawned upon me the extent of my limited control over the contents of my mind. As I reflected upon my life, spanning from childhood to the present, a stark realization emerged: my mind had perpetually wandered and remained easily distracted, rendering concentration an arduous task. The underlying cause, I discerned, stemmed from the lifestyle I had embraced, akin to that of the average contemporary individual, marked by excessive stimulation. Consequently, my unsettled state of mind had burgeoned, evolving into an almost insurmountable challenge to regulate. For a duration of two decades, I remained incapable of acknowledging this phenomenon within my being, primarily due to the absence of adequate mental capacity to objectively observe the intricacies of my own cognitive processes.

 

There is an individual named Beyond Live Linda Blood, who hails from Sweden and previously pursued a monastic life as a Buddhist monk for a period of 18 years. Just a few years ago, he made the decision to return to his homeland and embrace an ordinary existence. Upon his return, Beyond was interviewed by a journalist who inquired about the profound insights he had gained during his extended tenure as a monk, characterized by countless hours of daily meditation and minimal distractions. The journalist sought to understand the key revelation that he had carried back home. Beyond responded with a thought-provoking statement: "I no longer subscribe to the unquestioned validity of every thought that arises within me." Though this declaration may appear unremarkable at first glance, it holds profound significance. It is with this notion in mind that I stand before you today, my esteemed audience, to introduce a radical concept: the inherent freedom to exercise discernment in choosing one's own thoughts. By doing so, one becomes an architect, empowered to construct and shape their life according to deliberate design. For a portion of the audience, this concept may already be recognizable as it forms the fundamental basis of numerous meditation techniques. Alternatively, it might be an entirely novel notion that has yet to permeate your thoughts. Moreover, there is the possibility that you are presently entertaining reservations regarding the scientific rigor of this proposition, silently pondering how an individual with flamboyant attire managed to attain the esteemed platform of Ted Talks. Irrespective of your present perspective, I kindly request you to temporarily set aside any preconceived notions or convictions. Whether you hold the position of a corporate CEO or identify as a surfer, I extend an invitation for you to embrace an open state of mind for the forthcoming 13 minutes.

 

Currently, we encounter a global reality wherein, unprecedentedly, the number of individuals perishing as a result of excessive food consumption surpasses the number of those succumbing to insufficient nourishment. Moreover, the annual occurrences of suicides exceed the collective fatalities caused by war criminals and terrorists, marking a significant statistical disparity. I would like to present to you certain data concerning our present health status as a collective. This graph illustrates that presently, seventy-five percent of the population in the United States exhibits overweight conditions, while in Sweden, this percentage stands at nearly sixty percent. Another graph indicates a decade-long surge in the prescription of amphetamine-based medications to children below the age of 17, attributed to their diagnosis with attention deficit disorders. Furthermore, the data presented in this graph reveals that presently, close to one-tenth of the Swedish population is being prescribed antidepressants, while the corresponding figure in the United States is even more elevated. The presented data is of considerable concern. Nevertheless, it is important to note that these statistics resonate with me on a personal level, as I have personally encountered many of the situations described. The trajectory of my own experiences began a decade ago, marked by a sequence of harrowing events. Specifically, my mother tragically and unexpectedly passed away in an accident, leaving me engulfed in a state of utter disarray. It is pertinent to mention that I was merely 14 years old at the time. Several years later, I had acquired several addictions. Specifically, I became addicted to cannabis, sugar, tobacco, and video games. For several years, I resided in a state of perpetual distraction, attempting to shield myself from the anguish stemming from the permanent departure of the woman who held the most significant place in my life.

 

In our societal milieu, individuals are instilled with an inherent inclination towards seeking stimulatory experiences from the earliest stages of their lives. This inclination is clearly mirrored in the world we inhabit. It is important to note that this notion extends beyond mere reference to pharmaceutical substances; rather, it encompasses a broad spectrum of activities such as cinematic indulgence, spectatorship of sporting events, consumption of palatable delicacies like cream cheese, and engagement with melodious compositions, to name but a few examples. All these activities are representative of consumer goods, meticulously manufactured in response to human desires and requirements. Regrettably, we have relinquished control over our utilization of these stimulants, allowing them to exert an authoritative influence over our lives and the very patterns of our cognitive processes. This phenomenon holds utmost veracity in relation to both my personal experiences and past conduct. So, between tech billionaires, Buddhist monks, the military, and high school faculties, individuals are, to a certain extent, subject to involuntary influence from their own thoughts. However, they also possess the freedom to alter this state of affairs. The esteemed American psychologist and philosopher, William James, asserted that thoughts have the power to shape perception, which in turn shapes our reality. It is through the continuous interplay of our thoughts that our perception is transformed, ultimately influencing and molding the very fabric of our existence. The quality and character of the world in which we reside are merely reflections of our own mental states. Consequently, the sole means of shaping the world in which one desires to dwell or in which one wishes their progeny to inhabit is to acquire the aptitude for influencing their own mind.

 

I would like to present to you today the two most significant approaches I have developed for mitigating the influence of thoughts over one's self and assuming control over the mind and consequently, one's perception of reality. This realization has been instrumental in my personal journey of processing the emotional trauma stemming from the loss of my mother. It encompasses the key insight gleaned from my 18-year tenure as a monk, as elucidated by Bjorn Linda Blood, in addition to a fundamental concept extracted from William James's statement. The first method involves the practice of meditation. Cultivating a habit of engaging in this activity for a mere 15 minutes per session, conducted four days a week, holds the potential to profoundly transform one's life. Personally, I can attest to the transformative effects it has had on my own existence. Meditation, by definition, encompasses the art of cultivating mindfulness. It involves the deliberate and sustained focus of one's attention on a non-stimulating object, such as the act of breathing, for extended periods of time. This practice yields a serene state of mind, characterized by reduced susceptibility to overreaction, enhanced rationality, and improved performance. However, the ultimate objective of meditation lies in the impartial observation of the mind. Allow me to provide you with a visual illustration of the concept I am discussing. Envision a metaphorical web composed of thoughts, where each thread represents a potential thought path leading to different destinations. Through the practice of meditation and diligent training, one acquires the ability to discern patterns within these thoughts, discerning their likely outcomes and consciously opting for an alternate path. This transformative experience occurred during my time at the monastery. As I started recognizing which thought patterns led me to experience anxiety, patterns that had persisted for numerous years, I gained the capacity to redirect my thoughts towards constructive pursuits. Consequently, by gradually comprehending the intricate structure of our personal web of thoughts, we can actively anticipate the emotional states associated with particular thoughts. This newfound awareness empowers us to intentionally choose states such as tranquility, serenity, and heightened focus, while consciously avoiding stress, anxiety, and anger. While the concept is theoretically lucid, it can only be actualized when the mind is granted sufficient space and tranquility, free from incessant stimulation.

 

The second method entails the regulation of both mental and physical stimuli. It is commonly acknowledged that the adage "you are what you eat" holds true in the realm of nutrition. However, it is imperative to consider the concept that detrimental information can exert a similar influence on our well-being, leading to mental unhealthiness, cognitive obesity, and addictive behaviors. In the contemporary era characterized by an abundance of information, an unparalleled influx of superfluous data inundates our consciousness on a daily basis. This surplus of extraneous information subsequently exerts a discernible impact on our cognitive faculties, thereby influencing our value systems, shaping our aspirations, and even dictating our cognitive processes. It is incumbent upon each individual to conscientiously nourish their minds with discerningly selected information. By judiciously choosing such input, one can create a desirable mental environment conducive to gaining a thorough understanding of our minds and effectively exerting control over them. I kindly request you to consider whether it is productive for me to be consistently inundated with sensationalized newspaper tabloids, filled with content pertaining to death, sex, fear, and terrorism. The prevalence of such newspapers indicates that they hold a greater significance for terrorists than the terrorists themselves. It is crucial to exercise discernment when selecting media sources, as they frequently prioritize captivating headlines infused with fear and sexuality, thereby sacrificing factual accuracy in pursuit of generating your attention. Social media is a remarkable tool when utilized appropriately, but it can also have catastrophic consequences when abused. Its impact on society has been unprecedented, with individuals becoming increasingly addicted and deeply immersed within a remarkably brief period. It is worth noting that there is a newly recognized disorder known as "Facebook Addiction Disorder" in the world, which manifests through symptoms such as withdrawal, overdependence, and anxiety in the long end. A recent study conducted by the University of Pittsburgh has demonstrated that increased usage of social media is positively correlated with heightened feelings of social isolation. Furthermore, the study reveals a reciprocal relationship wherein increased social isolation prompts a greater desire to engage with social media platforms. Analogous to the effects of a drug, individuals perceive a sense of solace and improvement in their well-being through the infusion of a newsfeed, but paradoxically, it exacerbates their negative emotional state. Thus, my fellow acquaintances, it is imperative that you assume authority over your utilization of social media platforms, lest they begin to exert dominance over your life.

 

Advertisements also serve as frequently tainted sources of information. Consider, for instance, the abundance of commercials promoting sugary and nutritionally deficient food products. Presently, sugar, as a substance, stands as the paramount global menace to our well-being as a species. Alarmingly, its detrimental impact eclipses the combined casualties caused by heroin, cocaine, and amphetamine annually. In order to curtail the sale and promotion of sugar and sugar-based products, it is imperative to consider appropriate measures. It is essential to clarify that the proposition does not suggest an inherent flaw in sugar itself, as it holds significant benefits for numerous individuals. The crux of the issue lies not in external factors, but rather within our own cognitive processes and inclinations when confronted with these products and their advertising. It is crucial to acknowledge that their marketing efforts are driven by motives that do not necessarily prioritize our well-being. Therefore, assuming responsibility for our thoughts and impulses when exposed to and consuming such commodities becomes imperative. Consider the following notion: the human operating system has been fashioned over countless millennia of evolution to incentivize behaviors that facilitate survival within a context characterized by continuous territorial perils and limited resources. In that primordial realm, consuming copious amounts of honey equated to survival, as did eliminating rival tribes encroaching upon one's territory. However, humanity has transcended the primitive confines of the jungle, where insufficiency prevailed, and has subsequently erected an entire ethical framework centered on the notion of scarcity. Given the profound transformation of our environment, it is evident that our cognitive framework has become perilously outdated. Consequently, it is imperative that we embark upon a process of upgrading our mental operating system. It is incumbent upon us to transcend our current state as intelligent primates and instead aspire to attain a higher level of consciousness. You, like me, are a Homo sapiens: an intelligent human being and a member of the earliest known form of life. As individuals who strive to cultivate consciousness, we represent the culmination of evolution. I urge you to engage in introspection and contemplate the narratives that have shaped your existence. It is crucial to determine how you wish to navigate these stories, for, my friends, it is not the distressing, traumatic, or dreadful occurrences themselves that should instill the greatest fear in one's life. Rather, it is the unwillingness to exert control over our reactions to such events that truly warrants concern. Ultimately, your ability to assume complete responsibility for your thoughts will determine not only your personal journey and development, but also the trajectory and advancement of our entire world. I express my heartfelt gratitude for allowing me to be a part of this meaningful discourse.

See also: https://mygodsentangels.com/

Subscribe to our newsletter

Sign up for our newsletter to recieve news, promotions, and annoucements.