On one of the rare and sunny days in London, I put on a summery dress and stepped out of my apartment. Despite the cold air, I could feel the first rays of sunshine brushing against my exposed skin, and thought it was glorious. As I was nearing my office, a young man suddenly ran past me and halted me with a wave of his hand. He smiled at me and said, "I just wanted to let you know that you look stunning!" Upon returning home that evening, I shared with my husband the details of my experience and how it had left me feeling elated. It can be reassuring to hear positive affirmations from someone else in order to truly accept them. As the years have passed, I often recall that particular memory with a feeling of warmth and fondness. Although it was nothing special, it has had a lasting impression on me. I have a negative association with this person known as Tom Torero, who is one of these modern day ‘Casanovas’ that accumulates legions of admirers and conquers. His actions have tarnished my memory and I can never think fondly of it again. He teaches the art of seduction to thousands upon thousands of people. Recently, I discovered that Tom Torero instructs those he is teaching how to approach women by walking up to them in the street during daylight hours and making a gesture with his hand. Everyone knows what this gesture symbolizes and then he says something like "I wanted to tell you that I think you look very lovely today - please take a step back." Tom, or whatever his real name is, isn't the only pickup artist out there, and he's not even one of the most renowned.
Most of the international acclaim would go to his friends who are also in the game - you have Mystery but they all have ridiculous nicknames like Tyler Durden - that's Matador; yeah, that's Discovery and Ross Jeffries - which is actually his real name since he's been in this field for longer than these nicknames suggest. Are you wondering if guys really use this tactic of picking up girls? I mean, do they seriously try to get the attention of women even though they don't look that great? They have a knack for understanding and manipulating social dynamics; they are adept at recognizing your insecurities and taking advantage of them. No matter their individual approaches, the basic plan is always the same: lure you in by flaunting their attributes, break down your defenses, then make their move. They will search out your vulnerabilities, magnify them to you and then offer a ready solution - a short-term fix that comes with spending time with them. If you find yourself getting cold feet at the last minute, also known as LMR or Last Minute Resistance, do not worry; they have a range of techniques and strategies that will help make it easier for you to go through with your decision and theirs.
We have come a long way since the days of personal ads in newspapers - such as this one, 'a handsome young man gainfully employed looking for a young healthy musical lady for the purpose of matrimony' with no embellishment, just straight to the point. It was certainly indicative of the times! In 1838, when Procter & Gamble released their first advertisement in print form, the message was concise and to the point. However, similar to how the practice of wooing a lady has changed over two centuries, so too has the technique for enticing customers shifted. We've come a long way from simply being functional to now being inspired to go after any dream we have. We've been given the message that we can achieve anything if we put our minds to it. The glamorized version of the 1950s and 1960s, known as the "Mad Men" era, had people believing that they could be anyone they wanted to be. It promised a healthy and happy family life with all the trappings of luxury if you just drove a Cadillac. And why not? Even trips to the moon were possible - for cleaning, of course! Advertisers have figured out how to use emotional appeals to draw in customers, or as they would describe it, offer people certain emotional advantages.
There is no inherent issue with a company providing you with an emotional advantage, just as there is nothing wrong with engaging in flirtatious behavior. As an example, the phones you carry around in your pockets or purses can do more than just make phone calls; they also take photos, open apps and offer many other functional benefits. Depending on the brand of phone you have, it may give you a sense of coolness and superiority, or make you feel like part of an exclusive group. Alternatively, it could also make you feel liberated, as if you are not following trends - which is an emotional benefit. It's perfectly natural for a brand to give you an emotional reward, even if there is a cost associated with it. If they promise that you will feel cool, and it actually makes you feel cool - then so be it! Some brands and advertisers take it even further than flirtation - they enter the realm of manipulating social interactions. They try to uncover your psychological vulnerabilities, then amplify them in order to offer you their product as a simple solution. Just like pick-up artists, these entities have an arsenal of questionable tactics that make sure you surrender.
As an example, busy mothers of young children can relate to feeling exhausted and exhilarated all at once but also having a deep insecurity that they're not good enough as moms despite everything they do. With numerous duties and responsibilities weighing them down, these moms are doing the absolute best for their children but often don't have the time to get it all done. So, for mothers looking for a snack that is both nutritious and pleasing to their children is to select one that has healthy ingredients, tastes good, and will bring a smile to their faces. Let's take a closer look at the Kudos bar with M&Ms. Your kids are sure to be pleased and it has a healthy appeal too; it's low in calories, fat, and even contains calcium! It appears that this product is a win-win for everyone involved - that is what you want your target audience to think. Even though this granola bar is full of sugar, heavily processed with artificial flavorings and preservatives, which makes it far from healthy, you have not explicitly declared that it is a healthy product - legally speaking, you would be prohibited to do so in the US at least. However, there has been an impression created that implies the product is good for one's health. By providing your target customer with a temporary emotional boost, you have temporarily alleviated their insecurities. While this may provide them with a momentary feeling of security and comfort, it is likely that using your product could actually worsen these insecurities in the future.
In the 1940s, early studies in the U.S. began to emerge suggesting that smoking could be a cause of cancer, which understandably caused concern among some people. Despite this, quitting was still not easy due to the social appeal of smoking at that time. Some people may question if they should quit smoking in order to better their health. Despite the fact that many doctors smoke, it does not necessarily mean that smokers will feel completely healthy while using tobacco products; rather, it is important to consider which brand of cigarettes are being smoked, as this can have an effect on overall health. If this was a pickup artist, it would be like having the Picasso artist saying, "Don't worry about being too promiscuous - I once slept with a nun! So you can feel safe and secure while hopping into bed with me. Even if the next day you feel slightly worse about your sex life than before, don't worry!"
Many brands have been involved in the art of seduction for quite some time now, meaning they know how to be more efficient and discreet in their approach. This makes it even harder for us as consumers to recognize when we are being enticed by them. In the early 1900s, Gillette was a highly successful company in the United States, specializing in men's shaving products. However, this is not necessarily indicative of how well it would do in today's market. If you are already the market leader in selling a product that can only be used so much, your only way to increase sales is through population growth. However, if you want to boost sales further, convincing the other half of the population - women - to use your product could be very beneficial. Let's give women what they have been asking for - let's provide them with the love, sense of belonging and feeling that they are on trend. Even though there is competition between you and other market players, you can use ads, paid and branded articles as well as bijective publicity to create this trend.
This particular tactic of educating the market is known as "Marketers Talk". It has been successful for many brands, such as Gillette, and is a widely used method. For over a hundred years, Gillette has utilized their success to teach Eastern European women the importance of shaving. Likewise, they have also used this same approach to inform Mexican men that it is necessary for them to shave if they want to find a girlfriend. According to the agency behind the campaign, when asked how do you get more men to shave? The answer was simple: "You give them more things worth shaving for." This statement is said with pride. Throughout the years, Gillette has become increasingly subtle with their marketing approach. Now, they are utilizing messages of empowerment in order to promote the Venus line, which is aimed at female consumers. Instead of crude advertisements that encouraged women to shave in order to be loved, now it's about being a goddess and shaving like a woman below all necklines - who cares what Gillette thinks? While it may provide an emotional sense of security for someone struggling with body image issues, ultimately, it is still partaking in something that was created by them.
It is not necessarily a bad thing to make someone feel emotionally empowered; just like flirting can be done in a positive way. Providing women with emotional benefits that empower them is acceptable and encouraged. Nike has a long tradition of making people feel healthier and helping them to actually become healthier. However, if your product cannot make customers feel healthy or give them a sense of empowerment, or fulfil any other need that may appear attractive at the time, it's best to concentrate on what you can offer or work on improving your product. Brands can exploit our deepest fears in a variety of ways. This could include the fear of losing one's home, limbs, close relatives or even life. Such fears can bring devastating consequences to one's family. We are all prone to making decisions based on unconscious mental shortcuts, which can be taken advantage of. These have been programmed into us through evolution and include tendencies such as relying on the opinions of others for our choices, attaching higher value to things that are rare, or simply selecting an option out of habit. There are hundreds of these biases and they all influence how we decide. Certain brands take even more extreme measures, bypassing your thought process altogether and appealing to your subconscious. For example, the smell of freshly baked cookies may be sprayed in shopping malls to entice people into buying more or French music may be played to make customers select French wine over German varieties.
When you entered the venue today, some of you were given a card with a question on it which we refer to as our 'test trivia game'. You may have thought that you weren't vulnerable to tricks, however, we've already fooled you once! The exact question number is what matters here; some of you have been given a card that said it was Question 26, while others have received one that said it was Question 74. The content of the question itself is not relevant. When I tallied up the averages, the group that got 26 was around 40%, and those who had 74 were close to 50%. Entering a big shop, you don't even notice the plethora of screens with messages. This phenomenon is known as priming and it's very similar to what I was talking about before - you haven't looked at the number, didn't realize it was there and couldn't have been affected by it because you weren't aware of its presence. That's the point - you just don't know that something is there!
In the past decade, there has been an incredible boost in neuroscience which allowed economists, psychologists, cognitive scientists, pickup artists and marketers to gain further understanding of how our brains function and what causes them to falter. As a result of this progress, the list of ways we can be fooled keeps on growing. Currently, we are in the age of behavioral economics, where our cognitive biases and shortcomings - both mental, emotional, and psychological - are exposed and those who wish to exploit us financially or otherwise have a much easier time doing so. If you have been misled or taken advantage of as a consumer, it is not your fault. Don't feel ashamed or guilty for having been manipulated. Instead, take the same course of action that should be taken in any abusive relationship: leave. Be mindful and conscious of possible manipulation. At times, you may have the resilience to overcome your insecurities. If this is not the case, then I urge you to avoid getting into relationships with pickup artists. As a marketer or future business leader, there will be many instances when you feel pressured by sales targets and goals. However, life is not only about achieving them; there are other options so that even if one of the best pick up artists manages to get the highest score, they can still end up feeling lonely and alone. Hence, strive for success but remember that there are other possibilities too. Thank you for taking caution!
See also: https://mygodsentangels.com/