During the summer when I was sixteen years old, I embarked on a service trip alongside my family to Tajrata, a socioeconomically deprived community nestled in the hills of Mexico. Following the completion of our assigned tasks on a particular day, I made the decision to engage in a recreational activity by riding the horses. I had ridden those horses on a previous occasion, which instilled in me a sense of adventure. I believed that riding would be effortless since I possessed the knowledge and experience required. However, unforeseen circumstances unfolded, possibly due to a snake bite inflicted upon the horse. Consequently, the animal became uncontrollable, sprinting at an alarming speed. Despite my efforts to maintain a firm grip on the reins, the horse reared multiple times until I was inevitably thrown from its back. My body made forceful contact with the unforgiving ground, causing my head to collide harshly with the unyielding earth. For a significant period, silence permeated the surroundings. Subsequently, my consciousness returned, and I observed the distressing sight of my leg still entangled in the horse's side, with my shoelaces ensnared in the saddle, leading to my involuntary being dragged along its path. To this day, I can vividly recall the sensation of the dust, rocks, and small bushes relentlessly striking my face as my head rebounded against the ground. Regrettably, I lost consciousness. It was during this incapacitated state that my father discovered me. Upon witnessing my lifeless countenance and lack of respiration, he presumed that I had succumbed to my injuries.
I was urgently transported to the nearest clinic, and the extent of my injuries was quite severe. My arm had become dislocated, rendering it immobile, while my leg suffered from numerous bruises. Furthermore, my body was covered in bruises, and I experienced persistent pain in my ribs and back. Upon returning to Mexico City, our place of residence, I continued to endure intense pain and paralysis for a period of ten days. Consequently, my parents made the decision to drive me to the hospital. Despite the x-rays taken at the mountain clinic revealing no signs of brain damage, I experienced excruciating pain in my head whenever I moved, even the slightest distance of five millimeters. The journey to the hospital in Mexico City proved to be arduous, given the stop-and-go traffic, sharp turns, and sudden jolts required to evade potholes. Throughout the car ride, I whispered to my mother, expressing the unbearable nature of the pain and my desire for death. I found myself in an exceptionally vulnerable state, where even shedding tears became a painful ordeal. At the hospital, it was evident that my condition was grave, as Tess disclosed the presence of an extensive blood clot in my brain. The medical professional advised that surgical intervention was imperative; however, they also emphasized that the procedure carried a staggering 90% mortality risk. Furthermore, even if I were to survive the surgery, the potential consequence of enduring a vegetative state loomed ominously. Consequently, my parents adamantly declined to authorize the surgical procedure, opting instead to observe my condition for a period of 10 days. Should I surpass this critical period without succumbing to the ailment, they were willing to entertain the prospect of taking their chances. The news of my accident rapidly disseminated, and my family found themselves encompassed by a multitude of prayers and supportive gestures. Astonishingly, I began to recover at a rapid pace, leaving the doctors astounded. A neurosurgeon, involved in my case, conveyed to my parents that if they believed in miracles, this would be one of them, as the scientific explanation for this extraordinary turn of events eluded them. It was at the moment I comprehended the gravity of my condition that I was granted a second chance at life. My encounter with my father at the age of sixteen served as a poignant reminder of life's brevity, leaving me imbued with a profound sense of gratitude.
Now, it is important to note that prior to the accident, I exhibited a rebellious and moody demeanor as a teenager, causing significant difficulties for my parents. Nonetheless, my parents consistently demonstrated a strong sense of responsibility towards those facing homelessness, poverty, and illness. They instilled these values in my brother and me through their own actions, even if it meant dragging us unwillingly into uncomfortable situations. During my teenage years, I often dreaded these encounters as I was preoccupied with my own life, questioning why I was being forced to spend my time in such a manner. However, following the accident, a profound realization washed over me. I developed a burning desire to fully engage with life. While I did take my indulgence in parties and foolishness to new heights, I also experienced an intense urge to genuinely serve others. This time, I wanted to make the most of the extra time I had been granted. Conversely, my parents viewed my newfound passion with concern, suspecting that I had become even more audacious. Perhaps they were correct in their assessment, for I made the decision to dedicate one year of my life to serving in Mozambique, a country grappling with the aftermath of a 30-year-long war. As the service worker vividly described the harsh conditions in the remote village where I was to be stationed—devoid of running water, electricity, and telecommunication, teeming with wildlife hazards, diseases, and the looming threat of terrorism—my mother was overcome with fear. Meanwhile, my awareness expanded with each passing moment, and a deep intuition whispered to me that this was the path I was meant to tread. My rationale was simple: I had been granted an additional lease on life, and I refused to squander it. Against my parents' wishes, I embarked on this journey.
Mozambique held the unfortunate distinction of being the most destitute nation globally. During my time there, I devoted myself to aiding the children who were orphaned as a consequence of the war and participating in the reconstruction efforts aimed at rebuilding the decimated homes. It was within the African context that I initially found resonance with the Mayan expression "in lakesh alakin," which signifies the interconnectedness of humanity—I am you, and you are me. This profound concept of unity permeates the cultural fabric of the Makua people. My experiences in Mozambique provided valuable lessons in resilience, community, and solidarity amidst the constant uncertainty and vulnerability inherent in daily life. When the time came for me to depart Africa, a sense of reluctance overwhelmed me, yet my mentor imparted wisdom, advising me to return home, acquire an education, and thereby enhance my capacity to make a meaningful impact on a larger scale. The sentiments expressed are deeply ingrained within my heart as I embarked on a significant chapter in my life by enrolling in college situated in Memphis, Tennessee. The trajectory of my journey, spanning from the humblest of origins in my home country to the most prosperous nation on Earth, proved to be nothing short of astonishing. To say the least, the experience I encountered upon arrival was profoundly unsettling. Despite my brother's benevolent intentions, he took me on an initial excursion to the casinos as a gesture of hospitality. The ostentatious displays and extravagant squandering of wealth therein left me overwhelmed, grappling with a sense of bewilderment. It took me a considerable period to acclimate myself to this unfamiliar reality, as I found myself in a perpetual state of confusion. The stark contrast between the living conditions I had known and those I was now confronted with had left a void within me, a feeling that something crucial was amiss.
During the final semester of my undergraduate studies, I enrolled in my inaugural art course. As I diligently painted a vivid depiction of a sunset that had left a lasting impression during my time in Africa, I found myself overwhelmed by a mixture of sorrow and wistfulness. However, as I persisted in applying the red and orange hues to the canvas, I began to experience unfamiliar sensations. It was as if a luminous and invigorating essence, akin to the exhilaration of being in love, coursed through my veins. This indescribable inner flame compelled me to express my boundless joy through boisterous exclamations. In that profound moment, I unearthed my ardor for painting, recognizing its profound ability to nurture and restore. It has been frequently asserted that art is not merely a superfluous indulgence but rather a fundamental essence, and I discovered that I, too, required its presence in my life. In my art studio, I aspired to capture the profound allure of the common individuals encountered during my journeys, portraying them as exceptional beings. I endeavored to depict women engaged in the arduous task of selling flowers at the marketplace, fetching water from the river, and carrying heavy logs and jars. Additionally, I sought to immortalize families departing their native lands in search of security and sustenance. My chosen artistic approach aimed to communicate the essence of beauty amidst the prevailing struggles, concentrating on the transcendent qualities inherent in their narratives. Through amplification and celebration, I endeavored to underscore the resilience exhibited by these individuals and the richness of their lives.
Subsequently, my artistic endeavors began to scrutinize the issue of inequality within narratives, drawing inspiration not only from my personal experiences in various countries but also from my observations of inequality studies conducted in the United States a few years ago. During that time, individuals in positions of power employed abhorrent rhetoric to dehumanize marginalized groups. This disturbing phenomenon compelled me to express myself resoundingly through my art. Since then, I have regarded my work as a means to advocate for a distinct form of justice— one that encompasses geographic disparities and strives for the fair and equitable distribution of resources, services, and access as fundamental human entitlements. Consequently, my artistic pursuits have assumed a service-oriented trajectory, seeking to contribute to the realization of justice. Moreover, these efforts have profoundly resonated with me on a personal level. Not too long ago, if one recalls, being a Mexican immigrant was not held in high regard, as we were subjected to targeted actions. I embarked on the endeavor of establishing installations to bring attention to the plight faced by undocumented immigrants within our community. On a particular evening, my beloved daughter, who was merely twelve years old at the time (now eighteen), approached me with trepidation and tears in her eyes, inquiring, "Mother, why do you engage in such endeavors? Why do you utilize your artistic talents to provoke the government?" This questioning arose when the Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agency conducted raids in our neighborhood. As my family and I were not American citizens then, we found ourselves vulnerable to the risks of deportation and the tragic separation of our loved ones. In that moment, I embraced my daughter, sharing her fear and uncertainty, yet I implored her to recognize that we must not allow our own apprehensions about being torn apart to render us motionless. With deep emotions, I expressed to Anna, "I comprehend the fear this situation instills in us, but we must not be paralyzed by it." My artistic response materialized in the form of a barrier-free art installation, which encapsulated not solely the issue of immigration, but rather the anguish and distress experienced by numerous marginalized groups. It served as a platform for us to recount our individual narratives of hardship, providing an opportunity for others to connect with us on some level. At its core, this creation conveyed the universal vulnerability and suffering inherent in all of humanity, emphasizing that none among us possess impervious armor. By opening ourselves up to one another, we expose our vulnerabilities, while also gaining the ability to perceive and empathize with those around us.
Art has a profound ability to elicit a deep emotional response within us, prompting a connection to the divine, nature, or the universe, depending on one's personal beliefs. It serves as a manifestation of our inherent creativity, which is present in all individuals. Uncovering one's own creativity entails a process of discovering what truly captivates and ignites passion within. Once this passion is identified, wholehearted immersion becomes essential, disregarding any sense of competition with others. The objective shifts to embodying the most authentic expression of oneself. Furthermore, embracing vulnerability is crucial for artists. Fearlessness in exposing our unique perspectives enables us to present our work to the world, knowing that acceptance, financial compensation, or recognition are not guaranteed. Despite potential rejection, criticism, and undervaluation, the artist's unwavering belief and dedication in their craft persist. Oftentimes, societal pressures may arise, urging us to pursue conventional employment. Nevertheless, such external judgments hold little significance when compared to our passionate conviction in what we do. A key aspect of artistic endeavors involves acknowledging our role in supporting and serving one another in this world. The model of love and service permeates every aspect of our lives. By embodying these ideals, we create an environment where everything aligns harmoniously. When we approach our service with love, rather than a sense of duty, it becomes a source of energy rather than depletion. In turn, this energy returns to bolster us as we confront our own personal struggles.
Two months ago, I had the opportunity to visit Shiro's Cafe, a non-profit organization situated in India, which is managed by women who all have been victims of acid attacks. These brave women bear the burden of disfigured faces, along with the distressing fact that 95 percent of their assailants were members of their own families. Consequently, the majority of these women were forcibly expelled from their homes, subjecting them to unimaginable anguish. Their suffering is not merely physical and emotional, but also encompasses the weight of societal stigma and rejection. So, during my time at the cafe, I had witnessed firsthand the remarkable strength and resilience displayed by these women. In their testimonies, they recounted their journeys towards self-empowerment, recounting how they have regained confidence and found solace through their persistent and dedicated service to others. The ethos of Shiro's Cafe revolves around a "pay what you can" principle, emphasizing inclusivity and accessibility for all patrons. And as I sat there, engrossed in their stories, I was reminded of the profound lesson that if these ladies can overcome their adversities and still contribute positively to society, then each and every one of us has the capacity to do the same.
Let us now take a moment to engage in a collective exercise. I kindly request that each of you extend your arms. Once you have done so, place your hands upon your hearts and gently close your eyes. Direct your attention inward and establish a connection with your physical being, consciously perceiving the sensations present in your legs, core, arms, and face. Next, I shall instruct you to inhale deeply, filling your lungs to their utmost capacity, and maintain this breath within you. Prepare yourselves now. Inhale, drawing the air in profoundly. Hold this breath, embracing its fullness. Now, inhale even more deeply, allowing the oxygen to permeate every corner of your being. As you exhale, release the breath gradually, allowing it to dissipate into the surrounding atmosphere. It is in this act of exhalation that we discover a reservoir of strength, even when we perceive our capacity to continue as limited. Through our breath, we intake vital oxygen, which invigorates our very essence. However, it is not sufficient to solely take in this life-giving resource. We must also exhale, returning our energy to the world in its entirety. By utilizing this energy to pursue our passions and contribute to the well-being of others, we assimilate ourselves with their experiences and foster a sense of interconnectedness. In conclusion, I extend my gratitude to each and every one of you for participating in this exercise. May we all recognize the divine essence within us, and through our actions and service, embody the concept of "in lakesh alakin." Thank you for always creating more art for the world.
See also: https://mygodsentangels.com/