From the time my first book, "The 48 Laws of Power," was released, I have been receiving requests for advice from people in all sorts of occupations and walks of life. Having consulted with more than a hundred people over the years, I am now personally offering my services to help them. The clients I would come across with would have a certain problem: from a boss being difficult to a business connection turning sour or an opportunity which didn't turn up. They would approach me for help in each of those cases. I would encourage them to look inside themselves and identify the underlying feelings that were causing their dissatisfaction with the boss and job. Rather than looking only at the surface-level issues, my goal would be to help them explore the deeper emotions at play. They would often come to the realization, through our conversations, that they felt a deep dissatisfaction; their creative endeavors had gone unfulfilled, their paths inadvertently misled - ultimately incurring the desire for greater change in both their professional and personal lives. From seemingly overnight success to a small, one-bedroom apartment in Santa Monica, I can share my own story of personal transformation and change. I was unsuccessfully writing just to make ends meet, until suddenly best-selling status was bestowed upon me. For this special occasion, my first TEDx talk, I wanted to share something that I have never publicly related before: a story about change. It's quite relevant and pertinent to what I'm talking about here today.
Ever since I was young, writing has been something that I've wanted to pursue. I still had yet to figure out what kind of writing appealed most to me - novels, essays, plays? It all remained a mystery. After graduating from university, I pursued a career in journalism to ensure I could earn an income while expressing myself through writing. After several years as a writer and editor, I had the opportunity to have lunch one day with a man who had just edited an article of mine that was to be featured in a magazine. He had asked me to lunch because he wanted to give me some advice: "Robert, you should consider changing career paths. Your writing is too disorganized and strange, making it difficult for the average person to connect with it. Instead of pursuing this path, think about going to law or business school." I had to make a living and thus, entered a career that was not really fit for me. Consequently, my work mirrored this incompatibility. At first, these words felt like a blow but over the months I acknowledged something about myself – getting out of journalism was crucial. For a period of time after that, I went on a journey and pursued multiple jobs in various locations throughout Europe, such as construction in Greece, teaching English in Barcelona, receptionist at a hotel in Paris, tour guide in Dublin and trainee for an English television company near Brixton. This wandering was triggered by my sudden understanding.
The next thing I knew, I was writing for a long time and, despite my efforts, never achieved success. I attempted to craft numerous novels, all failing to surpass 100 pages; several essays I destroyed in frustration and numerous plays never got the opportunity to be produced. Los Angeles, California - my birthplace and where I was raised - is where I returned after years of wandering. During this time I held 50 plus different jobs, including detective agency work and other odd jobs. In the film business, my roles included assistant director, researcher, story developer and screenwriter. My parents, who I was blessed to have, were becoming increasingly concerned with me by 1995 when I was 36. I appeared to be aimless and had difficulty finding my place in life. I experienced moments of doubt occasionally, yet I never felt lost. Instead I chose to navigate life's uncertainty by seeking out adventurous experiences and writing my way through them. This enabled me to discover something new and persevere.
In 2016, during a work trip to Italy, I encountered Joost Elffers - a packager and producer of books. Our meeting would mark the beginning of an enduring relationship which has lasted until this day. While strolling down the Venice quays, Joost and I were approached with a provoking question from him - "Do you have any ideas for a book?" Promptly, the concept of power sprung to mind and I relayed it to him. I told Joost about the tales I read up on Julius Caesar, the Borgias and Louis XIV and how they were reflected in what I saw while working; only they had less bloodshed than their counterparts in reality. Reading books on history is something I do constantly. People, wanting to disguise their craving for power, tend to engage in so-called 'games': manipulating situations and creating a pleasant façade. All the while, they are concealing ulterior motives. He was excited when I provided examples of what I wanted to expose in my book, suggesting that I should write a treatment to see if it was suitable. If the treatment was satisfactory, he promised to pay me enough money so that I could focus on one half of the book while also meeting my living expenses. It seemed like magic, almost like destiny, when all the pieces of my past suddenly clicked together in writing what would become known as "The 48 Laws of Power".
Drawing upon all my previous experiences - such as journalism, television, theater and film writing - as well as the vast storehouse of ideas I'd garnered from studying history, alongside research skills that supplied an abundance of anecdote material, I had developed the necessary tools to successfully craft stories and organize my thoughts. Having been employed in a variety of roles, I was granted insight into diverse psychological fields. This gave me exposure not just to the good side of psychology but also to its darker aspects. Patience and discipline are two valuable lessons I learned from learning various languages during my travels. My knowledge and practice were profoundly transformed due to the variety of experiences I encountered: from teaching college classes, completing research projects, obtaining grants for projects, and working with various organizations. I had engineered my own education, in an unconventional and intuitive way, that perfectly prepared me to write the iconic book "The 48 Laws of Power". 1998 was a pivotal year for me; that's when my book came out and it was a huge success, completely changing the trajectory of my life.
The lesson that I shared with those who consulted with me and am imparting to you now, is that we have a tendency to be preoccupied with what can be perceived through the senses. This animalistic side of us means we often focus on external advantages when looking at the developments in another person's life. Grasping at the illusion of change in our own lives, we are nevertheless unable to achieve the great potential of opportunities. The ability to make dramatic changes comes from the invisible aspects of life: knowledge and skills increasing, work habits getting better, and being able to accept criticism. All of this happens slowly over time, leading to the prowess needed to be successful. The whole process of deep preparation carried out over time is what eventually leads to any change in people's fortune, which is just the visible symbol of it. By neglecting this internal, invisible aspect, we miss out on any significant transformation within us. Without paying attention to this aspect, nothing truly noteworthy or groundbreaking can be achieved. We always seem to reach a point where we feel stuck and yearn for an escape; so, when this happens, we often reach for something quick and shallow that generates temporary change. Yet, these currents of dissatisfaction end up becoming habits – imprisoning us in a never-ending cycle. Stop obsessing over the opinions of others, the money, and the appearance of success and instead look inward. Embrace the process of internal transformation – small, gradual adjustments that lay down foundations for much larger changes in your life. This is the key to true self-transformation. Grasping at an illusion will only lead to disappointment, while immersing yourself in reality will provide liberation and transformation.
Each and every one of you is unique - fundamentally one of a kind; your DNA, the particular way your brain is wired, and your life experiences – no two people can be exactly the same. You had a unique and special inclination towards certain topics and activities when you were a child. I refer to this as "mastery", primal inclinations in my book. Early on, these natural proclivities manifested themselves in very noticeable ways. You cannot provide a logical explanation as to why you feel so strongly connected and captivated by words, music, interesting inquiries of the world, or interactions between people. As you age, it can be difficult to stay in touch with your natural passions and preferences. Your parents may suggest what career path is right for you; teachers and magazine editors can advise if certain skills are strengths or weaknesses. Even friends have their opinions on what is trendy versus outdated. At a certain point, you may feel disconnected from yourself and the choices that you make in life. It is easy to enter a career which does not match your interests, emotions and intellect. Your life's task is to reconnect with the uniqueness that characterized you when you were born. It's a journey back to the inclinations and interests that make each of us individual. At whatever age you are, reflect on your early inclinations. Consider how they have changed or stayed the same throughout your life. The intensity of childlike curiosity that you have should be directed towards the topics in the present that maintain such fascination for you. For the past few years, those subjects and activities that you have been obliged to do but do not bring you any joy are something you must consider. Based on these reflections, you decide to focus on one particular area: writing, music, a branch of science, business, or public service. This direction will guide your future actions and goals. This loose framework now opens up a realm of possibilities to explore. Find what works best for you in terms of perspectives and postures. You should pay close attention to your internal compass, and when certain paths (e.g. journalism and Hollywood) don't match your feelings, you must make the decision to move on and refine your course - gradually strengthening and upgrading your abilities along the way.
Wrong turns and mistakes should be embraced instead of avoided on the path towards success and the perfect position. The journey is not always a straightforward one, but one that requires navigating obstacles and learning from experiences. The presence of difficult people and challenges in life makes one aware of their imperfections, broadens the range of experiences acquired and strengthens the ability to withstand challenging times. Nothing in this process is ever wasted; if you start at a later age, you must learn to combine your existing skills with new ones to navigate the change of direction. Cultivate these new competencies that are necessary for your journey and remember that all the effort put in will prove useful. The goal that you should focus on is acquiring and mastering skills, not merely collecting a high salary. This is the true meaning of "learning". You can notice a change in yourself as you adopt this internally-driven mindset. This transformation will manifest in many positive ways: with an increased sense of control and direction, greater clarity about your personal values and priorities, more motivation to achieve your goals, and more confidence in yourself and your choices. The enthusiasm that comes from pursuing something you are personally passionate about and emotionally engaged with makes the hours spent studying and practicing easier to bear. Your keenness to learn, grow, overcome obstacles and increase your proficiency keeps your attention focused for longer periods of time. Instead of continually worrying about what may or may not happen in the future, immersing yourself in the present gives you the opportunity to hone your patience and interpersonal skills. By giving better attention to your current tasks and those around you, you can become more socially astute. Once you have done all the necessary preparation, you will naturally reach a point where you feel confident and ready from within without any external pressure. Exploiting opportunities that come your way is now more important than ever. With sufficient preparation, you can even draw opportunities to you as people are likely to recognize the potential. Much like what happened to me with Joost, where I saw a great opportunity and seized it without hesitation.
The 10,000-hour rule, famously developed in Anders Ericsson's 1995 study; has recently gained scientific credibility - the results displaying this process can sound quite mystical. However, it is evidenced by research that this approach can yield successful outcomes. Ericsson's study on people who devoted a large portion of their lives to mastering either chess or music showed that upon reaching roughly 10,000 hours of practice, their minds became significantly more creative and agile. At the 10,000-hour mark, their performance and creativity had undergone a visible transformation; this was due to the alteration of their brain structures that had been brought about by long hours of practice. As you progress through this process, attaining the desired level of accomplishment will come naturally and organically. I believe that I'm proposing something quite revolutionary - the way to transform yourself is through your work. This means that what you do and how you apply yourself in it can have a huge impact on the person you become. work is often seen as dull, tedious, and unappealing.
However, I know this to be contrary to our entrenched societal beliefs. Self-transformation can be achieved through spiritual journeys, therapies, the guidance of gurus, intense group experiences, social gatherings and the use of drugs. Each of these avenues offer unique opportunities to grow and evolve on a personal level. Most of these methods are just ways to avoid dealing with our feelings of boredom and help us pass the time; but they don't actually get rid of our chronic boredom. Process and changes have no connection, meaning any shifts that happen don't persist. Changes made are not permanent as they are not related to process. Connecting to who we are is something that our work can help us do, instead of avoiding it. We don't have to run away from ourselves; rather, we can use our work as a way of getting to know ourselves more intimately. We can create real, long-term changes in ourselves through a gradual, natural process. By investing time and effort into this transformation, we can make improvements from within. This journey of self-discovery can be a very spiritual experience for those who embrace it. From discovering one's true nature to uncovering any underlying layers, this process is an exploration of the self. At the conclusion of this process, we proudly present our work to our culture which is both distinct and significant. Far from being plain or mundane, it is truly a special achievement. Thank you for wanting to stay creative!
See also: https://mygodsentangels.com/